Today I don't feel as ugly as I did. ... In high school gym showers I crouched in shame like Adam in the garden, but this morning in Amsterdam I was ten foot tall on a movie screen staring down at myself in the back row. ... Today in Amsterdam they taught me how to wear my body. Today in Amsterdam I learned that even if it's ugly, man, you gotta wear it like a gown. (Passing Strange)
Today with MaxEarnest I went swimming in a river without shame. I saw women my size (and larger) in bikinis enjoying themselves and MaxEarnest kissed me and I felt such joy. We kissed and kissed and kissed in the water, as he held me and I floated weightless.
Today with MaxEarnest I biked, in my swimsuit because I wasn't ashamed. Later, he asked if I wanted ice-cream, I said yes, and enjoyed it so much more, without shame.
What is it about MaxEarnest and Europe that has released me from so much shame? I feel whole. Lovable. Complete. Today with MaxEarnest.
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