I realize there's two parts of my personality that are similar, but quite different. I like to please people--most people. I bring my clients homemade brownies; I buy my family members things that remind me of them; I gave the woman who makes my coffee at Dunkin Donuts a $25 gift card this Christmas. My first Dom said I was the most thoughtful person he'd ever known. But that is really different from being submissive. If a guy (like my first Dom, known on this blog as "the ex") mistakes my thoughtfulness for submissiveness and takes my thoughtfulness as his due as a Dom, I got really burnt out. I don't know now to keep them clear. But I do think it is important to figure that one out.
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