Men behaving badly

A random senior citizen wrote me that I was an imbecile for using the world "liminal" and referring to stockings in my picture as fishnets.  "It's not a word, moron ... and if it is, tell me what it means. And obviously you don't know what fishnets are. Bottom line: Ignorance is always subject to mockery."

Now, in both cases, this random senior is factually wrong.  (Unless there is some size-rule about the size of the diamonds in fishnets? Mine are around half an inch each. If I'm wrong, tell me nicely!) Whatever.  Most men who insult me usually go with more generic comments and I find this amusing. But I also spent some time with it....

He said if it was a word, I should define it, so I did (relying on Victor Turner for the foundation and sent him a link to wikipedia's page on liminality).  I ended by asking him why he felt the need to insult women who'd never spoken to him and he did reply.

Don't try to hide your ignorance with big words. My eyes are fine ... those aren't fishnets, they're women's stockings circa 1930-1960. As for nether space? Please. Apparently that's the void between your ears.
As for why I'm "rude" to "random people," I'm quite courteous to 90 percent of most people h [sic] whom I communicate with on-line. But I do get a kick out of puncturing the balloons of the pompous.

Why do some men kinky guys find it appropriate to insult random women?  Presumably this random thinks he might, someday, meet someone in real life?  (And he has inspired the bitch in me, so I might add that he probably needs me to pay his social security, so he should be nice.) Wouldn't ignoring me be more conducive to getting one more chick off the market? Not that I'm dating someone who liked Ike. I have not seen this on any vanilla dating site, but it is relatively common in kink land.  At least once a week, some man e-mails me something nasty out of the blue. I don't get it.  Is it just because misogynists are drawn here and this is a good way of screening them out? Bullet dodged! Is it some version of power-play I don't get? Am I insulting someone in my profile without realizing it?

And, here's the other issue: why do I care?  Why don't I just block him?  What would happen if some 65 year old thought I made up the word liminal?  I love the word liminal.  I wish I made it up! Instead, I actually wrote him with care:

Meriam Webster has the basic definition: http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/liminal 

Victor Turner in his study of carnival popularized the study of liminality, which is that nether-space that is neither-and-both the places in=between.  It is the both-and place.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liminality 

To me, having a word that embraces the moments that are undefinable because they don't fit in is profoundly beautiful.

And that's when he told me the nether-space was between my ears.  What would happen if some 65 year old got his social security late and didn't get his eye glasses prescription updated and couldn't see that my seemed stockings are also fishnets?  Why is it so easy for me to become defensive?  Why can't I just laugh it off?

My mother used to say "be a duck."  I'm a shitty duck!  I cannot seem to let anything roll off my back.  I totally let work stuff roll off, but it is a force of will, and that is more exhausting than replying!  With everything else, it takes more energy to pretend to be a duck than to be my hedgehog self. 

What is very funny, though, is that I wrote him: "But I must say, you seem such a chivalrous and kind gentleman, I'm sorry that I have disappointed you. Clearly you would be a catch."  He wrote me back and started trying to flirt with me!!  He didn't get the sarcasm, and at that point, I just laughed.  And then I could be a duck.