Priorities

I was talking with a very dear friend about David, and she, of course, thinks I should be sensible and get out. She even thought that when I told her it was the first time in my life that I was with the guy I was fooling around with, rather than having my head off in fantasy books for at least some of the time (and usually it is most of the time).

Here's the thing, though. She's been with the same guy for 4 (four) years. And she says the sex is blah. Boring. Lousy. She thinks that 'bad' guys are good in bed and nice men are lousy and you just have to compromise. And she really loves her boyfriend and says they are compatible on so many things.

I was absolutely stunned. I can imagine compromising on a lot of things, but I can't imagine making a commitment to someone to never have sex with anyone else and the sex being really lousy. I just can't.

I think I have a higher libido than most women. I think my ideal would be sex 9 times a week. Intensive, rough, demanding, narrative sex 6 nights a week (figuring life would get in the way at least once a week, and it should be fun, and not another item on a check list); lazy, soft, gentle morning sex on the weekends and a spontaneous quickie once a week.

And I think my best friend thinks once or twice a month is about right. So I guess it makes sense that she and I would take different points on this.

It did make me wonder if I should prioritize sexual compatibly so high. But I honestly cannot imagine not making it a priority. I just can't. It would be like only eating unseasoned tofu for the rest of my life because it was good for me, and I shouldn't enjoy food as much as I do, so I'll just pretend I don't enjoy food. If I were the kind of person that could do that, I guess I'd be happier. But I can't even imagine pretending to be.