Empathy

Maxearnest just continually surprises me in these amazing, giving ways.

I went in to work today early for a meeting, which cut our time short this morning.  When I get to work, it turns out the guy I was supposed to meet was cancelling, but he e-mailed the secretary at 11pm last night (instead of calling me to let me know) and the secretary didn't get in until after our meeting was supposed to happen.  So I told Maxearnest I was frustrated.  And he just said he was sorry for my frustration and that the guy who cancelled shouldn't have.  But that was such a gift to me.  It felt like he cared.  This is the professional side of me, not at my best--in a bit of a self-righteous snit.  And he still cares.

All my life, my dad has lectured me that I shouldn't get annoyed when people do things like that, or far worse--malicious things--I'm always the one that was 'fun to tease' and so it was like I asked for it--even when I came home with a broken arm from getting beaten up by bigger kids, it was always my fault.  

I do think empathy is where my dad just fails.  In many ways, he's a good man.  He tries to do what is right, but he is defining what is right by this 1960s-EST-Me self-centeredness.  He just doesn't think about other people. At all.  Eventually, I learned to try and stop getting empathy from my dad.  Except when I'd need it most.  Then I'd slip and try and get it.  But it was futile and I mostly learned better.

But I still missed it.

And here is Maxearnest just empathizing with me.  Over something little, something silly, something I probably would be a better person if I didn't let it annoy me.  And the fact that he can give me that gift is just so embracing.